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  • Writer's pictureAndrea Benaim

What It's Really Like to be the Resident Foodie Friend



  • A person with a particular love or interest in food; a gourmet.

  • A person who has an ardent or refined interest in food and who eats food not only out of hunger but also as a hobby.

  • Me.

I truly am never as happy as when I’m eating, and I’m never more angry than when I’m hungry -- seriously I’m a nice person, but don’t even talk to me if I haven’t eaten in the last 3 hours. It will not be a pleasant experience.

I love food. Really. Much more than your average person. Food is a major part of any experience I plan. Actually scratch that: it’s the central part to anything I do: Going to the park? Let’s have a picnic. Going to the museum? Let me find a good place to eat for when we finish. New city? Here’s a list of restaurants we need to try, I'll make reservations. Birthday? Let’s get drunk at brunch.

Of course, this is a trend that the people around me started to notice as well, and slowly but surely I became the main food resource in my group of friends, and their friends by extension.

Here are the best and worst parts about being the resident foodie friend:


  • I hate a disappointing meal, plus I’m a control freak. I love that people are okay with me having the final say in decisions about where we should go eat.


  • Sometimes other people want to participate in the decision-making process, which honestly is helpful like 90% of the time, but I hate having to be like “mmm no that place is too expensive/far/gross/bleh” or some other iteration of telling people that they’re… well, incorrect...and still trying really hard to sound like a bitch.


  • If I pick a place to try for the first time with other people and it’s not as great as it promised to be, I feel like people will be disappointed in me as a person and not just in the food. (It hasn’t happened but the mere thought of it gives me anxiety).


  • It’s a great feeling when friends text or call me to ask me for ideas or recs for where to go or what to get at a place. Oooor when somewhat random people reach out because they heard I know things and want food advice. Seriously, I love it. Reach out any time.


  • When you recommend a dish or a restaurant to people and they LOVE it and they thank you for the amazing experience you blessed them with. Like yes. I love you. You’re welcome.


  • When I recommend a place to people and they don’t love it. It's hard because I'm recommending things I have no control over, and sometimes the best places can be inconsistent... but I always end up feeling like “aaahhh, I’m so sorry. You probably hate me forever now and will never trust anything I say ever again. I hope we can still be friends.”


  • Sometimes I don’t have the answers, but now I’ve created an expectation. So if people ask me for a food recommendation in an area of town I don’t know much about, I feel obligated to help them find a good place (with the disclaimer that I haven’t tried it first hand). There’s obviously a positive side to this, which is that it serves as research for me to try these places in the future -- no effort wasted.


  • If my friends randomly decide we should go to brunch on a Saturday because we were feeling “spontaneous,” it’s assumed that I’m the one who is going to find a really good place that will have a reservation for a party of 9 an hour before we get there. It’s stressful and I hate it.


  • The fact that sometimes people don’t ask for, or don’t listen to, recommendations, so they end up going somewhere that isn’t great, or going somewhere great but ordering the wrong thing. I know that this sounds dumb, but I’m always sad when someone has a bad food experience that I could have saved them from if given the chance.


  • I’m surrounded with people who love food (almost) as much as I do, so the culture within my family and my group of friends is one where everyone is always prepared to go try a new restaurant, or make a new dish, or experience a new city through its food.


  • Speaking of food culture: my relationship with food, and those of the people around me, is very positive. I’m not going to say we don’t food-shame each other -- but it mostly happens as a joke, and only when someone gets a salad instead of potatoes, or says no to dessert.


  • God forbid I try to get a salad. I’m simply not allowed. I’m trying to eat less meat and fish (because the Earth), and I’m genuinely afraid of the backlash.

Being the resident foodie friend is hard work, but I’m not complaining (okay I am a little but it's fine), I love the gig. Come to me for all your restaurant, food, and planning inquiries -- but please do as I say so I don’t have to be sad. On another note, I’m not a cooking expert, but I want to be, so please share recipes with me so I can be even more of a foodie? Please? Okay that’s it. Excuse me while I eat my feelings, haha bye.

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